The dark side of Mother Nature

Ivelina  —  April 17, 2012

I got this uncomfortable pain in my shoulders and neck for days. I woke up with it on Thursday morning . I was in pain and it wasn’t showing sings , that will go away .For the next few days I tried everything to make myself feel better-massage, exercise, hot baths -nothing seemed to help. Then I started to look deep into it.It was time to face the dark side of me and become friends with it.

Everything happens for a reason. Your body is talking to you. Listen and stop  thinking-just be still and quiet and you will feel . So here it was. For years and years I have been stimulating my body with caffeine and sugar and refined wheat. I would get up in the morning and first drug I  would take would  be coffee and lots of it.I haven't had my coffeeThis would give me an instant boost , only for a few hours and then I would need another one. By then I would be hungry and eat something-I would normally say to myself-there is no calories in coffee, as I take it black it means I can eat a croissant . Very cosy, not ! But anyway. Only to discover , that I am still hungry so I have to find something else.The days will pass  from one thing to the other and I would be constantly keeping busy to make myself feel important…What a waste of energy. I can’t believe I did that.

The dark side of me feels insecure and want to control everybody and every thing around me. I want to tell people what to do and what they have done wrong and how smart I am. I want to hide when people do not like me, but I want even more attention when I am  feeling insecure. That is the time when I am hardly noticed and no matter what I ask people to do it wont’t be done. I am using the word”ask”, when the reality is that I was giving them a direct order. So the next phase of that madness was that I would start moaning how much I do and how much mess there is. So when I finish moaning I would start crying and feeling sorry for myself.  That would be a good excuse to make myself another coffee…. This whole scenario  used to happen on a very regular basis. It was fueled  by the ups and downs of the caffeine and sugar fixes.

The dark side of me is my friend now. When I am feeling unsecure or unworthy I just stop. What is it? It’s just a thought and it is not true. When you say to yourself “I am safe, I am worthy, I am loved ” is peace and pure bliss. You’ve got the power.beautiful woman

Changing the way I eat is only an expression of the healing and detoxifying , that is happening with me and it has helped a lot.Clean water, pure food and superfoods are doing amazing things to my body. Changing what I eat and drink has changed my life and it can only get better.

I still have an arrogant  super woman living with me, but we are friends now. I am powerful and feminine  and I am giving  love and care. I feel so much inspiration and I love sharing  an abundance of gratitude. I can understand , I trust my intuition and I love learning. I am increasingly filled with Love, Passion , Gratitude and Fun.  

 

 

Ivelina

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I am so happy you are here. Consider yourself virtually hugged. I specialize in helping people to eat better and feel empowered by simply being authentic, wise and wild. In here you will find energizing recipes, blogging inspiration and an endless love of life with a hint of cinnamon and a breath of garlic sometimes. :-)