I am first and foremost me, but right after that, I am a mother. The best thing that I can ever be, is me. But the best gift that I will ever have, is being a mother.”
― C. JoyBell C.
The word”tao” is not very common in my vocabulary, but i decided to take part in a 30 Day blogging Challenge and the first Blog Prompt is called “The Tao of xxxx”. I stopped for a moment and reflected to find the word, that I would like to write about and intuitively “motherhood” came to me. I choose motherhood, because is the woman’s role as a parent. Parenthood is rather broad but motherhood is special in my eyes.
What does tao means really? Tao according to Oxford dictionary is (In Chinese philosophy) the absolute principle underlying the universe, combining within itself the principles of yin and yang and signifying the way, or code of behaviour, that is in harmony with the natural order.
Motherhood is an universe in itself, but also has it’s balancing parts which is a inevitable part of life and nature itself. It is a 24/7 lifelong calling, gift, choice and a identity for many women, whether they have given birth or not. The principles of Motherhood to me are quite simple, but in it’s simplicity lies the magic of connectivity and love.
1.Your children are your gifts that come through you and you choose to love and nurture them. There are countless ways to express love, but love has to be shared to grow, no matter in what way you find possible.
I don’t read parenting books and I simply follow my heart and intuition when it comes to my children.
In my mind I am a wild intuitive mother, that likes things to happen naturally and peacefully.
I do my best to do what is best for each of my boys. Each child is different and have a different character and that alone has made my life so rich and incredibly full of experiences and lessons. So just love your children actively in your own way. DAILY! Show them love the way you feel you should.
2.Take care of the mother in you. As a woman you possibly have many roles and being a mother is one of them. You are a friend, a daughter a lover and possibly work somewhere, too.All these are great and they do make you the person you are and your activities and priorities do change from time to time, so go with it.
How do you take care of the mother in you? You take care of your body. Sleep well. Eat well. Take your time to read, walk or whatever it is that you do that you love.
Cooking can be both therapeutic and practical. House work is the same to me anyway. I call hoovering an active meditation as it’s clears my mind. Become aware of your triggers when you feel stressed or overwhelmed. Normally the deep reason for them can be dealt with so pay attention to your inner voice and listen to it.
3.Learn to let go. There should be a class in school for all girls that mothers have to learn to let go. I have written a blog post about that in my other blog in more detail about the hardest thing about being a mother is to learn to let go.
In a nutshell I believe that letting go has been the hardest thing for me to learn. To learn that I can not possibly control every situation, can not possibly control how quickly my kids grow and all the choices that they make.
Let go of the need to be needed all the time, to mother them like babies even when they are almost teenagers now.
Learning to let go of the need to be a model mother and to have everything perfect and organised. Also another one is the letting of the person I was before I became mother. All these lessons are ongoing paths, that I take daily.
There is no formula for a perfect motherhood. You are a part of the magical circle of life and you connect the branches so beautifully. Motherhood teaches me to put others needs in front of mine, it teaches me to be open minded like to other book I have ever read. Motherhood is a priceless personal development “class” that I take almost every day. I love the constant challenges, demands and the endless love that it brings to my lie.
I can not imagine myself not being a mother and this is how it’s going to be. I aim to give and teach my kids everything that I know and when they think of unconditional love I want them to think of me.